Poopy

So, Match Day was March 19. On Monday, we found out that Schmoops actually didn't match. The emotional roller coaster that has ensued since then has been so turbulent that I can't even bring myself back there to accurately describe it. I don't want to do it injustice by wording it poorly, so I think I will just skip it all together. Suffice to say, it was surprising, disappointing, frightening, confusing, angering, frustrating and a whole bunch of other adjectives all rolled up into one. At the end of the day, he could have settled for a position for the sake of his pride to say he matched, but he took the high road and decided he didn't want to settle for a position out of desperation. And he didn't want to force me to move to Wichita or Boise, which I am forever grateful for. So now, here we are. Seemingly back at square one, but don't you worry. He has tricks up his sleeves and we are going to be just fine. I don't know where yet. But we'll be happy there. And I'm at peace with it.

I wasn't at such peace last Thursday. Between this cumulative stress of the preceding days, eating a lot of takeout during my travels, and lil boo boo totally fucking with my whole stomach/digestive area, I would up in the ER as a very unhappy camper. Next time you go to the ER, keep in mind that screaming and making a scene will get you a room ASAP instead of waiting in the waiting room. But also keep in mind that screaming and making a scene when you are friends with the residents hanging out there, because oh yeah- you're at Vanderbilt- is kind of embarrassing.

So, after my screaming and crying finally subsided, it was determined we had to find out if the shithead who did this- I mean, lil boo boo, is okay (I can say that because I know now he is just as happy as could be). Anyway, so one of these tests was a diagnostic ultrasound. Usually ultrasounds are happy and exciting and you are supposed to look at the dad with tears in your eyes and hold hands.... This was not one of those ultrasounds. This was one of those ultrasounds with one screen that was positioned in a way that I couldn't even see, with a very clinical sonographer who would not answer questions or say anything helpful at all. But, she was kind enough to turn the screen for one photo she took. The shot was a big W. Two legs spread eagle, with lil boo boo's penis sticking out the middle. It was the most fantastic picture I've ever seen, but of course this wasn't the sort of ultrasound that gives you souvenirs to post on your blog. Boo. :(