Dissecting the toddler brain

You're nervous already, aren't you? So am I.

So, before giving up and letting Solomon wear his pajama top to daycare this morning, I spent approximately 45 minutes chasing him down to change him, pinning him down to take off his beloved helicopter pajama pants, holding his feet still to put on clean pants while he frantically tried to put his helicopter pants back on, and then listening to him tantrum mercilessly afterwards. His tantrum could have gone on much, much longer (he was inconsolable until I finally wrestled the octopus into a mesh bag so they say by strapping him in his carseat-- the second we started driving he was magically happy again), and I'm still in awe of how only 45 minutes passed on the clock, because I'm pretty sure I aged at least 7 years during this ordeal.

Regardless of his random, spontaneous obsession with his helicopter pajamas, and regardless even his hoarding of about 10 objects he must have in his crib with him, and maybe 5 that must travel with him in the car, there is the one toddler act that drives me the most batty. It's the 'I want shoe! I want shoe! I want shoe!' But when I try to put on his shoes, 'Nooooooo,' when I try to hand him his shoes 'Nooooooooo,' but when I put down his shoes it's 'I want shoe! I want shoe! I want shoe!' So far this morning he's done that with: mama, up, shoe, keys, bottle, teddy, blankie and play doh. It really legitimately drives me bananas. Way more so that any other form of tantrum. At least with your normal, run-of-the-mill tantrums, you have an out. It'll make you a bad mom and susceptible to scorn and ridicule, but you know any second you want to you can make it stop by just giving in and giving him whatever he wants. So you have some little inkling of power or control you feel inside you, even if no one looking on might agree with you on that. But this.... is indefinite. You don't know what he actually wants, so never are you sure in your stance of giving into him, or holding out. Seemingly no one has the power or control, no one is happy, and there is no end in sight to the cyclical trauma of wanting something you don't want the second it is offered but wanting it soooooooooooooo bad when no one will give it to you. Ooof.

So, my question is: why?? Why on earth do toddlers do this? Surely Solomon is not the only guilty party. Please God tell me other kids do this too (really I want to hear that other moms somehow survive this... phase. Yes, that's the key, tell me it's a very short-lived phase.)